but when i go on bebo & facebook and see all the geeks seem to have done really well for themselves, and they have started looking less geeky... they all seem really happy in their photos, blog, updates, yada-yada-yada... they all have loads of friends, and are happy... and they were the lowest of the low at school (their words, not mine)..
however in social terms i was kind of middle-class in the cool department: not quite a dork, not quite a cool kid (AKA Dickhead), i was just in the middle, a la Shia LeBeouf... :p
im happy for those guys, dont get me wrong, but it saddens me that i always had friendships wherever i was, school, college etc. but could never hang onto them after we left... i admit, i do have some problems forming connections with people and maintaining friendships (relationships im ok with, sort of, but friendships are haaaaaaaaaaaard :( seriously...)
so i was just thinking that i wish i had some friends who i could hang out with, cos really i dont have any.. ok, i tell a lie, i do actually have one really good friend named Andy... and im dating a nice girl i knew at school and college... and things aren't going so bad. Perhaps that should be enough? Perhaps I'm being selfish? Who knows...?
But i do know that i wish there were more... all i want in life is 3 good friends and a girlfriend... soooooo i have 1 friend, and a girl who is nearly my girlfriend i think... so really, all i want is 2 more friends... but ive never met anyone who is the kind of people i'd wanna hang out with.. theyre all either:
-cocky
-stuck up
-scum
-sporty
...i just want 2 more friends who are cool nerds, like me and Andy!! thats all... just 2 friends to hang out with and watch TV, play Xbox & Warcraft, love music like I do and just be decent genuine people with no ulterior motives... hmmmm maybe i'll be happier if me and my possible gf hit it off, we'll se... i just want 2 more mates.. im sure its possible tho, it has to be!!
maybe one day... :)
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